Sunday, October 12, 2014

Him, her and a surprise

A series of conversations over a period of one week ...


Her: You better turn up this weekend. We have made this plan almost 2 months back, and I am in no mood to make any changes, forget about canceling the plan.

Him: Yes, dear! We must make it this time. Been a long time we went on a long vacation. I will do my best to ensure nothing untoward happens this time at the last moment. Let's keep our fingers crossed.

Her: Feel free to keep your fingers crossed. And wait to see what I do with mine if you don't turn up.



His friend: So, all set for the vacation?

Him: Yes, super excited.

His friend: Make sure you visit the three places I suggested to you. Without that, your vacation is incomplete. I am sure it will make it memorable.

Him: Yes buddy. The three places are a part of my itinerary.

His friend: I will of course keep on getting the updates on Facebook.

Him: Right! Hope I get a chance to get a sneak peek of the "other" place you suggested. (Wink, wink)

His friend: (Wink, wink) And yes, don't forget my "travel consultancy fee".

Him: Of course. I owe that to you. ☺

His friend: By the way, is the surprise on?

Him: Yes (Wink, wink)


Her: Are you going to take the usual 8:40 PM flight, that reaches here at an unearthly hour? You can take care of some last minute preparations if you come early.

Him: Honey, that flight is the best option available. All other flights are during day time. I can not leave office before ...

Her: #$^^$#%^& (Disconnects the call)



Him: There has been an issue. A consultant in my team committed a big blunder, and his backup has to travel home because of some medical emergency. All of us are pitching in to finish the deliverable. I am sorry dear, I know we have been waiting eagerly for this vacation. But ...

Her: Whatever! Why didn't you fight with your boss? Why should it be you every time?

Him: Did my best dear. You know how it is.

Her: #$^^$#%^& (Disconnects the call)



Client: You have done a great job in preparing this plan. It will make my life easier when you are away for two weeks.

Him: Thanks! I have also transitioned a few key activities to my second-in-line. I think he will be able to manage those activities perfectly in my absence.

Client: Great! You are all set for your vacation now. ☺




Him: Not happening dear. I am so sorry. We will have to ...

Her: #$^^$#%^& (Disconnects the call)


Him: Hello!

Her: (Disconnects the call after a long silence)



His friend: Are you sure you will be able to manage? From my experience, she will somehow make out.

Him: She will not come to know. Don't worry. I have planned it perfectly fine this time. She already hates you the most for your goof up, am sure the client would not like to hear the new superlatives being coined for him, it has been proven beyond doubt that the medical emergency for which our friend is traveling is not an emergency but a common hoax call.

His friend: 



Him: Hello!

Her: (Disconnects the call after a long silence)



Him: Have you used the new taxi booking app? I downloaded the latest version today morning before booking my airport cab. It has some new features.

His friend: Great! I will download it right away. What time will you be leaving?

Him: 6:15 PM

His friend: I can see the excitement on your face now ☺



His second-in-line: Have a great vacation buddy! Much needed break. And all the best with your surprise.

Him: I don't want to say so but feel free to drop me a text in case there is anything urgent.

His second-in-line: Hope the need doesn't arise!



Her: #$^^$#%^&

Him: (Making the payment to the cabbie) Hello! Dear, can we please talk later? I am on my way to the other office of the client.

Her: Why are you doing this to me? You know I don't like this.

Him: What?

Her: #$^^$#%^&

Him: Listen ...

Her: I will not open the door if you reach today.

Him: Fine, but I am anyways not coming today.

Her: You know I had taken out the extra set of keys from your bag last week you were here.

Him: But ...

Her: (Slightly irritated)  You know very well that I will be fast asleep at your usual time of arrival, because you told me you are not coming. And you better recall that I do not like to be awakened when I am least expecting it.

Him: Listen ...

Her: The next door neighbor is also out-of-town, and your friend, who was your savior last time you did a misadventure, is also out on a vacation.

Him: Why are you telling me all this? I am not ...

Her: (Slightly louder now)  Are you sure you want to continue this?

Him: Continue what?

Her: You know what I am saying, and by now you should know that I know.

Him: You know what?

Her: (As if slowly reading from some carefully taken notes)  That you left your client office at 6:25 PM, that is 10 minutes late, on a cab booked for the airport ...

Him: (Wondering how in the world she knows that)  Honey, that is not for me. I made the booking for a colleague ...

Her: (Becoming a bit louder) ... but the cab stopped at your favorite snacks joint for almost 10 minutes and it was waiting for a long time at the usual busy traffic junction. You also took a different route today to the airport, you have reached the airport just now and the registration number of the cab is ...

Him: (Suddenly recalling the mobile app feature that lets his near and dear ones know about every step of his cab experience, and trying to make another attempt to continue his surprise by daring to interrupt her)  Honey, my colleague is also a regular at the same snacks joint, and he would also have passed through the same traffic junction. After all, he was also on his way to the airport, right?

Her: Your next cab booking that you will now say you have made for your colleague shows our apartment as the final destination. And I don't know any colleague who stays in our apartment.

Him: (Struggling to find another escape route)  Oops! That must be a mistake. I would have repeated the previous booking, as I always do. I will cancel that booking right now.

Her: Last chance ... do you want to sleep with the watchman? #$^^$#%^&

Him: No, I will reach my hotel late, and will perhaps not be able to sleep because of ...

Her: Send me a selfie on WhatsApp right now, that shows me that you have reached the client office.

Him: Honey, you know I am not on social media during office hours.

Her: Did you give your credit card to your friend? Our mail shows the transaction details for the payment he made to the cab.

Him: (Finally giving up, cursing himself for selecting the shared mail account for receiving the credit card transaction details)  Honey, not fair. You should have let me give you a surprise this time. I will reach home at the usual time. I know you will be waiting for our regular cup of coffee.

Her: (Triumphantly grinning)  Didn't I tell you that you can never hide anything from me? You should not have checked-in on Facebook after reaching the airport.

Him: Damn technology!